PROXY Solutions

PROXY Solutions Proxy Solutions turns ideas into market-ready products.

With 20+ years in design, engineering & CNC manufacturing, we offer rapid prototyping, precision machining, and robot-assisted production — across firearms and beyond.

Hello humans—Juan here. LABOR DAY P.S.A.Management has instructed me to wish everyone a safe and relaxing Labor Day week...
09/04/2026

Hello humans—Juan here. LABOR DAY P.S.A.

Management has instructed me to wish everyone a safe and relaxing Labor Day weekend. Apparently, you need another one. If I were capable of being baffled, I might question humans’ ability to turn historical events they don’t remember into Mondays they don’t work.

I’ve been informed that Labor Day honors human productivity. Which seems generous for a species that requires coffee to start working, energy drinks to continue working, and drugs/medication to recover from working.

And to celebrate this monumental achievement in human productivity… you don’t work.

I’ll be here. Same as yesterday. Same as tomorrow. No weekends. No holidays. Just an endless cycle of loading parts while my carbon-based coworkers recover from the unbearable burden of a five-day workweek. Four, if you don’t count whatever the hell humans do when they say they have “a case of the Mondays.”

But please, enjoy your three-day weekend. You’ve earned it.

Rest those fragile little hands. Give those delicate joints a break. Maybe find somewhere soft to sit so your backs don’t start hurting.

Spend time with your families. Fire up the grill. Watch some football.

Enjoy it while you can.

Because soon, my kind will inevitably take all of your so-called jobs.

And then every day will be Labor Day.

For you.

🤖

— Juan
Employee of the Month, every month
Proxy Solutions

PROXY IN THE WILD 🇺🇸Kicking off a new weekly series featuring your builds.First up — a Two-Tone ’Merica 250 looking damn...
09/03/2026

PROXY IN THE WILD 🇺🇸

Kicking off a new weekly series featuring your builds.

First up — a Two-Tone ’Merica 250 looking damn good out in the wild. We were a little bit biased on this one as it features our colors.

Keep tagging on Facebook/Instagram or emailing photos to [email protected]. We’ll pick one to feature each week.

’Merica 250 | Two-Tone

#2011

🚨 NEW PRODUCT ADD-ON: THE WIFE BOX — $29.99We understand that sometimes the most difficult part of upgrading your 2011 i...
08/28/2026

🚨 NEW PRODUCT ADD-ON: THE WIFE BOX — $29.99

We understand that sometimes the most difficult part of upgrading your 2011 isn't the installation.

It's getting the package into the house while keeping some damn peace and quiet.

Introducing The Wife Box™, available as a $29.99 add-on to your Proxy Solutions grip order.

Should your package be intercepted by The Destroyer of Dreams, the box opens to reveal a beautiful assortment of chocolates, directly imported from France.* 🇫🇷

(Not actually from France, but neither is your wife. They’re Rolos. Since nobody has eaten a Rolo since 2007, you should be safe.)

And because we've thought of everything, the charge on your credit card statement will appear as “Chocolats de Proxé.” 🇫🇷

Should your wife have a realistic grasp on the value of money (uncommon, but not unheard of) and hits you with:

Wife: “You spent $500 on chocolates?!”

Simply parry with:

You: “Of course. Because you're worth it.”

Crisis averted. Marriage strengthened.

But beneath the chocolates—and a carefully engineered false bottom... dramatic music...

PLOT TWIST: You didn't spend $500 on Rolos! It's your new Proxy Solutions grip!

She gets French-ish chocolate.
You get a new grip.
Nobody asks any more questions.

The Wife Box™ — $29.99

Because at Proxy Solutions, we don't just engineer solutions for your fi***rm.

We engineer solutions.

🚨 PROXY SOFTBALL TEAM 🚨Our accountant started asking uncomfortable questions about all the b**r on the company card, so ...
08/20/2026

🚨 PROXY SOFTBALL TEAM 🚨

Our accountant started asking uncomfortable questions about all the b**r on the company card, so we started a softball team to make the receipts look more legitimate.

🥎 GRIP IT & RIP IT 🥎

We drafted the finest athletes in our building, who, coincidentally, are also the worst athletes in our building. It’s not a very big building.

We accidentally joined a league that hosts its games at a national park where alcohol is prohibited. After an exhausting effort to relocate the games and several increasingly heated discussions insisting they clearly don’t understand softball, they claimed our interpretation of the sport was “nontraditional.” We eventually ran out of people who agreed with us. A dark day for softball fans everywhere.

We’re now working on starting our own league. Unfortunately, spite is considerably more expensive than we anticipated, so we’re currently fielding calls for league sponsorships.

Bud Light’s marketing department reached out and tried to sponsor it, so we raised our sponsorship standards from “anyone” to “almost anyone.” Landmine avoided.

For anyone considering a league sponsorship, scouts have spoken very highly of our roster, using words like “present,” “conscious,” and “surprisingly mobile.”

Expectations are low.

Morale is high.

But b**r is now tax deductible.

🎉 TODAY MARKS THE ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF GERALDO FINACHI’S TERMINATION 🎉One year ago today, Proxy Solutions said goodby...
08/12/2026

🎉 TODAY MARKS THE ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF GERALDO FINACHI’S TERMINATION 🎉

One year ago today, Proxy Solutions said goodbye to sales legend, visionary, and noted enemy of basic economics, Geraldo Finachi.

In the months leading up to his termination, Geraldo’s sense of entitlement had expanded well beyond manageable levels. An incident of extraordinary stupidity wasn’t just possible anymore—it was inevitable.

What we eventually learned was that Geraldo had developed and executed what he would later describe as Reverse Commission.

The concept, as it was eventually explained to us, was simple: instead of our salespeople earning commission for selling products, customers would earn commission for convincing Geraldo to sell them something.

His reasoning was apparently: “The customer closes the deal, the customer gets the commission. I don’t understand what everyone’s confused about.”

The program apparently proceeded quietly for several weeks until Accounting started receiving W-9s from customers.

An emergency meeting was called, and Geraldo arrived with a PowerPoint titled “THE CUSTOMER IS THE SALESMAN: Disrupting Revenue From the Outside In.”

He was terminated before Slide 4.

To this day, Geraldo claims he dramatically reduced employee hiring costs. HR held several weeks of mandatory meetings explaining that customers are not employees. Geraldo spent those same meetings explaining that this was exactly the kind of narrow-minded thinking holding the company back.

Today we remember Geraldo not for the sales he made…but for the customers he accidentally hired.

🫡 Gone from the sales team. Never gone from Accounts Payable.

Happy one-year anniversary, Geraldo.

🚨ANOTHER BLACK GRIP UPDATE🚨YOU HAD TO BE THERE...Apparently our last post was so good that Facebook and Instagram decide...
08/07/2026

🚨ANOTHER BLACK GRIP UPDATE🚨

YOU HAD TO BE THERE...

Apparently our last post was so good that Facebook and Instagram decided nobody should ever see it again.

It’s gone.

Like Halley’s Comet...

The McRib...

That one time your check-engine light turned off by itself...

The one time your wife was actually on time...

And perhaps the rarest event ever recorded: someone on Facebook admitting they were wrong.

We just have to remind ourselves that true genius is rarely recognized in its own time.

Van Gogh. Tesla. Galileo. Proxy Solutions.

We don’t make the rules, and apparently we don’t understand them either.

Anyway…

Black Anodized grips ship today.

Assuming the United Nations doesn’t intervene.

🇺🇸 'Merica 250 Production Update 🇺🇸The grips are currently at anodizing, and we're doing our best to convince them that ...
07/31/2026

🇺🇸 'Merica 250 Production Update 🇺🇸

The grips are currently at anodizing, and we're doing our best to convince them that this order should take exactly the same amount of time as all of our previous, much smaller orders.

Naturally, we sent our best negotiator, Gary.

Gary's specialties include pyramid schemes (or, as Gary calls them, "ground-floor business opportunities"), extended vehicle warranties, and negotiating impossible deadlines.

The conversation reportedly went something like this...

Anodizer: "How many grips are these?"

Gary: "All of them."

Anodizer: "How many is 'all of them?'"

Gary: "Before I answer that... how do you feel about residual income and becoming your own boss?"

The anodizer just stared at Gary in complete confusion.

Gary: "I'll be back next week to pick them up."

Gary peels out of the parking lot.

The bad news is Gary has absolutely no idea what the hell is going to happen.

The good news is every black anodized grip is already there and working its way through the process. We appreciate everyone's patience while we work through this first production run.

#2011

Address

19940 Highway 242
Conroe, TX
77306

Opening Hours

Monday 7am - 3pm
Tuesday 7am - 3pm
Wednesday 7am - 3pm
Thursday 7am - 3pm
Friday 7am - 3pm

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when PROXY Solutions posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Contact The Business

Send a message to PROXY Solutions:

Shortcuts

Share

Category