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Simon the Handyman Laurencekirk, Laurencekirk (2026)

11/06/2026

Hi Guys, yesterdays weather I wasn’t touched by the torrential rain and even hail that occurred, yep, the location I was at working you could see the black clouds over in the distance heading towards Laurencekirk and the surrounding area.. poor bu**ers I thought with smile😉. I on the other hand I had sun all day with only a couple of splatters of rain drops that lasted moments… but today was a different matter. Weather forecast showed rain late morning carrying on for much of the day.. bu**er as I had lots to do at my clients this morning, better get moving and started the garden maintenance just before 8am. The clouds were looking ominous off in the distance, strimming done first all around the garden before cranking up the lawn mower with two cut heights required due to the wet grass…no hail was left on the ground when I arrived.. what a shame👍. Next, finishing off the very big hedges I started two weeks ago, I couldn’t get access to the neighbours garden to cut the top and side in there garden of my clients hedge. All done and all looking neat and tidy… sorted, next the road side hedge trimming was the final stage of the garden maintenance. This bu**er of a hedge is tall so the telescopic hedge trimmer was used to good effect on top then the sides were done followed by the big clean up just before the heavens opened. Yep I got a bit soaked loading my car up but everything was completed👍. This afternoon I visited new clients before heading home to get the house prepared with Dawn for our visitors from France arriving tomorrow.. Snails aren’t on the menu during there stay.. I hear a collective phew from the snails outside🤣. Some photos of the day.

10/06/2026

Hi Guys, it’s been a full on day with the completion of the Mother of all slabs power washing😄… these bad boys I have done in the past so I know the best way of tackling these slabs two hoses and two extension leads had to be used… its a huge area. Arrived early to get started as I wanted to finish this first stage of the project before returning on Friday for the last day projects booked in… boys toys on Friday👍. Unloaded all my equipment including “Bert the Power Washer” my bad boy power washer was eager to get going, but first, rehoming plants from big pots and put them in the big border, wheel barrow was a must shifting these to get them to the border… four bushes planted, dug out the daffodil bulbs and put them to one slide. Big planters were removed and all plants removed… sorted. Now came the big power washing, the sun was really strong so factor 30 applied before the I started, front steps done first and what a difference then on to the huge patio area😳… section by section was done and just finished he whole area before lunch time👍. After lunch everything had to be moved to start on the long slab path to the huge back garden patio area leading to the garden.. path done and all the railings slabs and wall slabs done, all coming together nicely with the slabs looking good👍. Rounded the corner to the last patio… off into the distance was the finishing line….all day power washing is not easy especially standing in the sun, phew😎. Anyway eventually the last slab was completed just before 5pm… yay finished and the back patio looking really good.. sorted👍. That was tough going in the sun but really pleased I managed to finish all the slabs🤘. Some photos of the day.

09/06/2026

Hi Guys, back to doing gutter cleaning once again today.. this property I have done before but 2 years back so was a little intrigued in how the gutters were shaping up with muck🤢. As always, safety fist putting my ladder on the platform to secure the ladder, this is a great piece of equipment giving you peace of mind knowing it’s impossible to get ladder slip on any surface and pitch of ground👍. Safety climbers helmet on and extra heavy duty disposable gloves on, climbed the ladder on the first section of guttering and was met by clogged down pipes, fermenting leaves/ moss. You name it, it was nasty🤢 and yucky… now in this state with stagnant water covering the smell of rotting debris, but no sooner do you put your hand through the water… thump the smell hits you😳. You think you will get used to it….na, what a stench erupted from the gutters. Why is it you suddenly want to scratch your nose or get an itch somewhere… tricky when your up a ladder. Anyway, the front of the property gutters were done with one full bucket of stinking muck. I knew from the past that the big single gutter a deep and nasty place to remove the fermenting debris awaited me😱.. it didn’t disappoint, it’s one of those horror film moments of plunging your hand into black nasty muck and something grabs you! This bad boy of a gutter takes a lot of cleaning out and the SMELL… this time flys were annoying me around my face.. bu**er off or words to that effect. Mucky hands and and flys around your face don’t mix.. you guessed it, a mucky hand swiping flys away debris splattered on my lips😱😱😱. Now here’s a things, with Doughnuts you can lick your lips! O No, down the ladder I went to use the hose pipe and wash my face… yuck is all I can say. Not nice, having a beard means it’s like Velcro, everything sticks to it so quick look in my wing mirror to discover nothing there🤘. Drama over, I carried on with the back of the property to the huge flat roof area, the big debris catchers were blocked, all removed and cleaned out. Then headed to the gutters where they are easy to access standing on the roof. In total, three buckets of debris cleaned out… at least I won’t be biting my nails or picking my nose with these smelly hands🤣. This afternoon, new clients visited for site surveys….sorted.

08/06/2026

Hi Guys, weekend went extremely quickly but all the batteries fully charged ready for the coming week👍. Today I had to build a bridge, not any old bridge but a Japanese Bridge that’s all the details I had, all I had from my client, there are four very heavy large box’s😳. No other details so somewhat apprehensive thinking this could be very interesting to say the least. Armed with lots of tools just in case arrived early to get cracking on the project, was advised the four big box’s were in the porch .. yep big and very heavy, these were taken out into the back garden and laid out… this is going to be fun🤘. Anyway, what I discovered, only one of the box’s was the bridge… the other three had “Geisha Ladies” …😂, only kidding, but they contained compost bags and bird seed😄. Somewhat relieved unloaded everything with the bridge structure laid out.. this will be easy peasy lemon sqeezy.. not so when I started on it, words of total faff is good terminology. Anyway, music choice, Black Sabbath and Wasp🤘. None of the pre drilled holes allowed the bolts to go through three sections of the bridge making it a total faff as each section was built trying to put the big sections together was a nightmare 🙄. Wonderfully detailed drawings…not, again designed by a four year old who has just drunk “Coke Cola”!. All supports, rails and main underneath structures were laid out with battens screwed in place to hold the structures together…sorted.Now came screwing in place all the other battens, all were laid out before hand on the bridge to get everything lined up before screwing them down. Eventually the bridge was built and looking very neat and tidy.. totally solid for foot traffic. The bridge was set up by the Bamboo on the foot path.. had a couple walks over it to make sure all was good before my client walked over it… sorted👍. The Lovely Geisha ladies posed on the bridge for the photo shoot😂. Next, the four big compost bags were taken to the side of the property where I had already drilled holes in the bottoms of the big tubs for drainage, all filled up then the fruit trees were planted. A good soaking was required in each tub…., next hanging up garden decorations for my client.. sorted. It was mid afternoon before I packed up and loaded up the car including the “Geisha Ladies” umbrellas had to be folded up😂. On a sad note🙁, I lost my watch heading to the dump with rubbish from today.. it must have come off when at the dump as I remember catching it when lifting stuff to the containers.. didn’t feel it coming off😩. I searched everywhere retracing my route .. nothing. This watch has been everywhere around the world with me making it particularly sad loosing it!
Some photos of the day.

05/06/2026

Hi Guys, it’s Friday… yay👍… it’s been once of those weeks where I have been outside doing garden maintenance.. the weather hasn’t been on my side but all projects have been completed successfully with happy clients.. you can’t ask for anything more. Today, the sun was out breaking through the clouds allowing the grass to start drying out… at my new clients for a full garden maintenance on both front and back garden areas.. the back garden caused issues especially being stabbed by “Monkey Puzzle Trees”..who were determined to stab me OUCH😩. Anyway, arrived early unloaded and had a feeling I was being watched behind the curtains.. “WHO’s this.. what’s he doing” etc etc, best not do my snake hip moves from yesterday doing the weeding while listening to Latin music as that would probably get the Police around plus, it was to early for the neighbours 😂. Luckily for me the front didn’t need much doing bar weeding in all the areas and remove the weeds from the block work drive… what a faff but all done👍. Good sweep up then headed to the back garden with all my equipment while doing the Samba, those snake hips of mine😂😂😂. The back garden was looking a touch hairy following rain and sunshine.. and the weeds growing between the slabs.. what fun. Anyway, it was too early to get listening to music plus the neighbours properties were too close perhaps AC/DC wasn’t on the cards but I did listen to more Latin music at very very low volume 🕺. First task was the weeding in all patio areas, behind the shed, under the bushes and the raised beds with the Monkey Puzzle Trees…I do apologise to the neighbours who may have heard some Anglo Saxon words this morning but you just had to say something after being stabbed weeding or brushing past with a lawn mower .. OUCH! Weeding completed then on to edge strimming around all areas before 2 x cut heights were needed to get the grass looking neat and tidy. A good sweep up was required before packing up.. what a difference the garden is now looking but you could almost see the grass grow behind me when mowing😳. Headed to a site visit with a new client this afternoon before heading to B&Q for supplies. Dawn and I are going to relax over the weekend as it’s been full on work wise for us.. beer and crisps this evening👍. Have a lovely weekend everybody😎

04/06/2026

Hi Guys, back at my clients fortnightly garden maintenance with everything soaked…. Can’t think why😂.Arrived early as there was a window of opportunity in completing the garden maintenance before it pi**ed down, very ominous black clouds all looking very moody! Unloaded and cracked on with the occasional splatter of rain causing me to stop and see if I was about to be drenched by a killer cloud creeping up behind me. The dreaded gravel creep awaited me.. RAC Rally or dukes of Hazzard in doing doughnuts on the gravel😂. Luckily I will be spreading a product later this year that will bind the gravel together and with any luck, stop the Dukes of Hazzard gravel creep. Anyway, front garden all now looking neat and tidy once again.. weeds are a bu**er at the mo… rain and sunshine great combination for turbo growth🙁. Headed to the back garden where I can listen to my music while weeding the two big borders.. music choice “Latin” yeah baby my snake hips were moving to the beat of the music while weeding.. was half expecting to see bods turning up thinking this was a party 🤘. There is definitely space for dancing… and my Latin snake hips finished the weeding.. alas nobody turned up to dance….well it was early😂. Lawn next with the stimming of the edges then mowing with two cut heights required..done just as big rain drops descended from the sky but only the surrounding area. Headed back home to unload before heading out again for a hedge trim but this time , the big rain clouds followed me to my second job of the day… buckets of rain came down with the occasional flash of lighting.. this was cancelled for another day.. it was too wet to get my snake hips moving again😂. Managed to see three new clients this afternoon so the afternoon was not a total let down. Some photos of the day.

03/06/2026

Hi Guys, wow what a thunder storm yesterday evening.. biblical is a understatement, was expecting the Ark to float by but the flooding was short lived. However, a few businesses in Laurencekirk did get a soaking internally due to the volume of water. Today back at Poppies Pre-School for the fortnightly garden maintenance…arrived with the remnants of the storm water evidence on all the paths and grass, water must have come from the road over lapping the pavement down into the front garden area bring all the debris, gravel and leaves. First job was a good sweep up to make things presentable 👍…the big borders had a good hoe and rake to remove the weeds then onto the grass edge strimming. The grass had really grown quickly with both lawns requiring to cut heights to make things neat and tidy.. sorted. A tree had a very light trim to take off some long twigs, the tree all nicely shaped once again, headed to the big ultra spiky hedge that I love doing…. not😳. Looking a touch hairy so all the fresh new growth was taken off now looking neater, a good sweep up was required.. sorted. During the morning the Bird Table/Nesting box had lots of bees flying in and out of the box getting a touch miffed as I was making so much noise, the bird table was carefully up lifted away from the front door and put in a safe area by the big hedge, the bees following me .. phew never got stung👍. This afternoon visited new clients for site surveys… all painting on sash windows, front doors and a big fence. Dawn and I will be sampling the New Indian takeaway this evening… can’t wait for the extra hot Vindaloo .. “loo” at the end of the word is probably needed😂😂😂😂. Some photos of the day.

02/06/2026

Hi Guys, what a day weather wise trying to do garden maintenance in this weather.. due to my diary fully booked out these weather conditions make it extremely difficult to cancel a booking as I would then have catch up, but I don’t have room for that luxury. This morning heading to my client the heavens opened up, O bu**er but within a few miles dry as a bone👍, back at my clients for the fortnightly garden maintenance and was greeted by once again a meadow. This weather is causing everything to grow very quickly.. too quickly making especially damp grass to mow an extreme faff🙁. Arrived early with the sun trying to come out as it suddenly became very humid.. all my work gear started to stick to me as I worked my way through the meadow with the lawn mower… stop start was the progress with unblocking the grass shoot into the collection box. Bag after bag of heavy wet grass was dumped into the green bags, by half way, perspiration was dripping off me trying not to wipe my forehead with very green wet gloves. Bu**er no good just have to wipe… by the time I had finished mowing both front and back lawns, I saw myself in the car wing mirror looking like Rambo with the camouflage streaks on my face😂.. better get those removed. Anyway, all done with the final bit of grass strimmer edging… sorted. After two cut heights required on the grass, this took me after 1pm, needed to head home to change out of my damp work gear and headed out once again to see new clients over in Forfar. Only just got back before the Thunder Storm… Fork lightening a plenty.. spectacular if only it was at nighttime this storm🙄. On a last note, Laurencekirk has a New Indian Restaurant called the “Cinnamon” ..Dawn and I spoke to the manager on Sunday afternoon as we walked past to pick up a menu. Can’t wait for a take away and Cobra beer👍

01/06/2026

Hi Guys, another weekend came and went extremely quickly but Dawn and I had a great time at “Mofest” listening to live bands in various pubs… four to be exact, but can’t recall how many beers were drunk.. put it like this, we were relaxed😎 Great event catching up with bods we know in the various pubs, Rock, Country, Indi and Soul were our choices of music we wanted to listen to. Sunday, we christened our new BBQ as the old one had heavy use over the 16 years … the bottom fell out! So the Sunday roast was Polish Sausages, chicken thighs with salad, coleslaw and fresh yummy brown bread watching the sun go down behind our cabin.. beautiful sky last night. Today, it rained all morning at my clients doing garden maintenance a touch soggy is a good word but all the mowing, strimming and hedge trimming on the 7 big bushes and the bad boy very hairy side hedges were done. Able to use my new Battery very long reach hedge trimmer to good effect on the top of the two big hedges… well pleased with the reach of the trimmer plus the battery stayed good lasting for the whole morning👍. Five big green bags filled and taken to the dump.. and me a touch soggy. Headed home just after 1pm to get out of my damp work gear and changed into fresh gear before heading to my second client of the day putting up these heavy shelves in the narrow gap between the cupboard and wall. Now here’s a thing, these shelves required four screw hanging points on the wall, done these many times so I find attaching paper to the back of the shelf so you can puncher exact holes, transferring the paper to the wall and make the location holes on the wall… fool proof and always works. First shelf up sorted then the other, all totally level👍. Some photos of the day😎

29/05/2026

Hi Guys, Friday yay😎.. has been a full on working week with lots of happy satisfied clients and lots of various projects making a satisfying week for me. Today at my new client with the various project phases to be done during the course of the year namely garden maintenance and everything in between, today everything in between👍. Arrived early to get cracking on building two bench/ table furnitures that had been already partly assembled by either a company call “Bodge- it and Leg -it” or someone who definitely needed to go to “Spec Savers” .. I had already seen the mess the bods had done some time ago when setting up a site visit on the furniture and huge garden, so was under no illusion of what lay ahead of me😳. Arrived early and set up my works area on the big raised patio… a real sun trap, factor 30 splashed on and the music ready… Pink Floyd set the mood👍. The half built or can I say not built properly furniture was looking very sorry for it’s self in the garage, lifted up a section and it fell apart, bugggggger😡, these had to be all screwed/ bolted together again in the garage before I could lift them.. cor these are heavy and take them to the patio, what a faff. All laid out to be put together, first thing you notice is wood splinters on the side legs where bolts had be forced in a hole.. what a “B” mess they had done..it appears there had been a manufacture fault where pre bolt holes hadn’t been drilled in by the manufacture. However, there is no excuse in making a hash job and damaging the furniture plus their holes they had put in were totally in the wrong position 🙄. Rant over, the process in finishing off the furniture was down to me.. have done many of these, so prep in getting it level so the sections can joined together is very important, table supported, each section was aligned marks were made and new drill holes done👍. The first table done and all sections are solid, plus it turns into a bench or table…sorted. The second bench/table was the problem child, this I had to re- constructed so all the parts fitted properly especially the moving part section transforming it into a table…what a faff, yep choice Anglo Saxon words were mentioned carried off into the wind.. it’s getting very windy here😳. Lots of tweaking had to be done before new hole were drilled.. all done as the furniture transforms from bench to table… SORTED😁. These were moved to their new homes waiting to be sat on👍. Next, Compost bins to be built.. instructions were totally useless as designed by a four year old… what a faff but eventually two bins built and transferred to the shady part of the garden… done. All done but will be back on Monday to finish off the list, putting up shelves👍. Have a great weekend everybody as Dawn and I will be heading to Montrose for the music festival..crowd surfing here I come with beers 😄😎🤘. Some photos of the day.

Simon the Handyman Laurencekirk

11/06/2026

10/06/2026

09/06/2026

08/06/2026

05/06/2026

04/06/2026

03/06/2026

02/06/2026

01/06/2026

29/05/2026

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